2005-10-12, 9:25 a.m.

Ever since I got certified to use the mace/pepper spray, I've been dying to use it.
Well, I finally got to use it, and I feel terrible. I feel like I should write the guy an apology letter. It wasn't such a thrill to use it after all, it just wasn't how I visualized the scenario to be. It came about innocently.

I wasn't feeling so hot, a bit of a stomach ache, hangover perhaps, and I went to the kitchen to get myself a bucket of ice.
To get to the kitchen, I have to walk through the Medical department. As I was walking through I saw a new Officer with a suicide inmate,(you can always tell a suicide because they aren't wearing clothes, but these stiff Flintstone suits or stiff blanket) I said hello to them, got my ice and was going through again.
To go anywhere in the prison you go through a series of gates and locked doors. There is a CentralControlStation that mans the gates/doors.
I'm walking through Medical again, I see the same Officer and inmate on my way back. As I was about to enter through another door, the Officer asked me to stay for a moment, so I put my ice down and went over towards him and the inmate. I didn't know what was going on, so I just stood there in a secure stance.
The nurse came out and told him (the inmate) that he was fine and that he could go back to his block. The inmate wasn't going to have any of it. He insisted that he wasn't well and refused to leave.
The Officer then gave him an order to leave, he refused and started to become agitated. I then unsnapped my pouch for the mace. The inmate heard the snap and told me he didn't care if I maced him or not, that the mace doesn't bother him.
In the mean time, Central must have been watching the drama unfold on the cameras and another Officer came in. He then ordered him to leave, again he refused. The Officers then put their gloves on and grabbed him, the inmate began to fight them and they knocked him to the ground.
And then there is me, I'm just standing there caught up in the drama, acting the spectator. Wondering how this was going to play out....instead of doing what I should have been doing....calling for all units to assist.
Anyhow, they have him down and one Officer yells for cuffs..I gave him mine and he got one arm cuffed...still on the ground trying to control him...and suddenly the inmate wants to bite at the Officer.
The last thing you ever want to happen to you is to be biten by an inmate, that or having their feces or urine thrown at you.
When he went to bite, the one Officer yelled spray. Not remembering that to yell spray is a warning to back off, I pulled my spray and sprayed him/the inmate.
I just stood there then like I wasn't even a part in this drama. It was then that backup arrived. They came into Medical and started coughing and gagging because of the mace. And all I could do was stand there looking down at the inmate, during the struggle his blanket became loose, so he laid there bare ass naked, looking like a fish out of water. His eyes were closed and twitching and his body was making little jerky movements. I felt so bad for him, he was just so pitiful laying there on the ground like that.

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