Classic Panic Attack
2004-11-28, 7:36 p.m.
Today just wasn't my day.
I went to put a grocery list together and I was suddenly attacked with over stimulation!
I started crying, couldn't see, couldn't breathe and my brain felt like mush. I stood over the trash can gagging.
I felt like Vinny, bawling and screaming -I can't breathe! Even though I was clearly breathing.
Yeah, classic panic attack.
Been a long time since I had one that bad.
It started with the ebay items, Sharon feeling bad because she felt responsible and my trying to tell her it wasn't her fault, my stepFather going MIA for several days and my FIL's lady friend being very sick and in the hospital and the cherry being ..... worrying about Dawn's reaction to the letter I had mailed; to which I've not heard from her about.
Tim told me not to bother with dinner, but it is Sunday and I always crave spaghetti Sundays.
Matty came home from work and I finally was able to manage to cut up vegetable, asked if he liked my spaghetti...he looked at me like I was retarded, then suddenly the tears come down again.
While I was chopping the peppers ,onions and smelling the olive oil with garlic, I began feeling much calmer. I called Sharon up while she was shopping at Walmart and had her look and see if they had a real Barbie Doll House, explaining I handled the confusion over my bids at ebay and then told her to stop over for dinner.
Jeffery was here when Sharon came and she had the joys of helping with the [lack of] English. The phone rang as Sharon was playing the Sims2 and I told her, -watch, that will be Dawn, calling to yell at me.
I wasn't to far off....it was Tina. She had her baby.
Tina had a little girl and she isn't in good health. So many things wrong with the baby.
I hope and pray the Doctor's and Nursing staff can convince Tina, that it is in the best interests of the baby, if she were to give her up.
Tina can barely take care of herself, let alone a 3 year old and now a little girl with special needs.
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